WHAT IS GAMOPHOBIA?

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Do you remember that partner you once had, and everything was smooth and rosy, the sex was great, the chemistry was mouth-watering and you were the envy of all, a sight to behold until you placed a tag on him or her as your boyfriend or girlfriend as the case may be. Then from there, everything took a different turn until you eventually became strangers.

Now I'm not talking about the reluctance or selfish games of fuckboys or fuckgirls as it may. I'm talking about a paralyzing fear of commitment or marriage. That is Gamophobia, a strong irritational fear of commitment or marriage.


Gamophobia falls under the category of specific phobias. People who suffer from it can have a full-blown panic attack from the least thought or the most playful mention of marriage or commitment. This is beyond having a cold foot or nervousness. It is a life-altering kind of fear. Such that the thought of commitment alone is enough to make your heart begin to race or leave you lightheaded. One if left unmanaged could rob you of a happy and fruitful relationship.


Causes of Gamophobia

Like other specific phobias, the causes of gamophobia are sometimes hard to place. A number of things could lead to being afraid of commitment or marriage. These may include; environmental influence or childhood trauma.

However, there are some things that have been discovered to be responsible for the majority of gamophobia cases. This includes;

  • Having divorced parents.
  • Past emotional trauma. Mostly ashes of a previous failed relationship and heartbreak.
  • Genetic anxiety disorder.
  • Underlying mental illness.


Symptoms of Gamophobia

A person who is scared of commitment would have multiple signs to point at. And as a partner, you should be aware of these signs to pinpoint if your partner is scared of committing to you or getting married.

Pay attention to these symptoms should you notice them;

  1. Sweating, difficulty in breathing, racing heart or feeling queasy when you think about marriage or commitment.
  2. Having a panic attack when the topic of marriage is raised.
  3. Feeling depressed at weddings or around married couples.
  4. Avoiding married couples, friends and family.

It is important to make it known that anyone can feel nervous about walking the aisle, but gamophobia is the type of fear that greatly affects you in all aspects of your life. 


Overcoming Gamophobia

Just like every other phobia, the fear of commitment or marriage can be managed and overcome as long as an effort is put into the process.

The following options are wise to consider;

1 Figure out why you're scared

Discovering the reason behind your fear of commitment is essential, once that part is done and you can place why you are scared, then you can proceed easily to tackling it head-on, finding help and overcoming it. With a bit of determination of course.


2 Talk to your partner


When you've discovered you could have gamophobia, don't run away, don't ghost on your partner, don't leave their messages unread instead, TALK TO THEM.

They deserve to know the truth, you owe that to them. Be honest and open with them. Who knows, they may be willing and ab;e to help you overcome it.

Also, it is important you talk to them so they don't feel they are the problem and you left because of something they did wrong.


3 Figure out what you want

Be sure of what you want from every relationship you're in and be clear with your intentions to your partner. 

Picture yourself in 10 years, if you will still love to have your partner by your side, then you should just take the bold step and work on your fear.

What will change if you marry your partner? Since you have no plan of leaving your partner, then it's unlikely that anything will change if you get married. 


4 Start hanging out with happily married couples.

Invite your married friends over for dinner, allow them to make you jealous with their lovey-dovey show at the dinner table. Admire the bond they share, attend weddings too.

Mingling with married couples may help alleviate your fears. Seeing how they interact with each other will also give you a better understanding of marriage and help you get rid of the negative reservations and ideas in your head.


5 Medical checkups.

An anxiety disorder may be a result of underlying health or mental health condition that can be treated. 

Get yourself checked out, the doctor can run some tests to discover the reason you are fearful and anxious, then draw out a treatment plan that helps you get better. 


6 Counselling

Is there a problem that can't be solved with the right therapy? Book an appointment with a counsellor. You may go with your partner or go alone and talk your issues through with an expert till it's solved.


Conclusion

A fair percentage of people across the world (roughly 27% give or take) has gamophobia, so you are not alone, there are people like you and there are people who can help you. Reach out for help, make effort to get better. You should not allow your fear of commitment or marriage to keep you from being happy and having the relationship you want when you can work on your phobia. 

A little determination to fight the cause of your phobia will also go a long way. Be honest with yourself and your partner, then the odds are in your favour, you will beat your fear and love committedly.


Tell me about your experience with gamophobia in the comment section. Clap the article and follow me so you never miss a thing from me.

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